Articles by

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein

Fink is a man of many words, and many web links. He likes to argue and seldom loses. Mostly because he’s well informed. And somewhat gassy.

CarMax Salesman Performs Emergency Birth

5 year veteran CarMax car salesman Sherman Hoover performed an emergency car birth late yesterday afternoon after a pregnant 2011 Land Cruiser unexpectedly gave birth to its offspring.

Area Criminal Critically Ill After Accidentally Siphoning RV’s Septic Tank

Area petty criminal Jimmie Saldoscent has been booked into the Wayne Brown Correctional facility after admitting to accidentally siphoning raw sewage from a Grass Valley recreational vehicle after intending to steal gasoline.

Borg Accidentally Assimilate Charlie Sheen

Cheers rang out across the Federation yesterday as officials announced that the Borg had accidentally assimilated American actor Charlie Sheen into the collective.

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