Articles by

Michael Stephen

Michael has been through pretty much everything, and his sole aspiration is to get you through it more quickly and with less pain.

South Carolina’s “Giraffe King” Creates World’s First Compact Giraffes

In Fair Play, South Carolina, eccentric Bobby Lee Jenkins astounds the world with his peculiar creation: short-necked giraffes. These whimsical creatures, Dolly, Molly, and Wally, blur the line between genius and madness, while townsfolk marvel at the spectacle. A curious tale of ambition and animal husbandry unfolds in this quaint Southern township.

Murderous, Screaming Rampage Results in Missing Spider

Police responded to a home on the 12000 block of Squirrel Creek Rd. on Sunday night upon receiving reports of a woman screaming and a man yelling, “Die, bitch! I am gonna [deleted] kill you!” Officers were advised to proceed with caution.

County Enjoys 4th Straight Day Without a Car Accident

The greater Nevada County area just enjoyed its 4th consecutive day without a single car accident. The stretch of Hwy 49 between Auburn, through Grass Valley, and into Nevada City is a complete mess of treacherous roadway and stupid drivers.

The NRA’s Wayne LaPierre Offers Tear-Filled Resignation

Wayne LaPierre, the CEO and Executive Vice President of the National Rifle Association, said recently that, “you can have my guns when you pry them from my cold, dead hands tomorrow.”

Fox News Lawyers Rape Dolphin in Arizona Court

A favorite mascot for childhood morality was gang-raped by a team of Fox News lawyers on Thursday, setting off what insiders are calling "a wave of sadness."

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