Sacramento, CA – In an attempt to leverage their logo and make bank off it, the State of Jefferson movement has opened a strip club with an adjacent porn shop in a remote area of Siskiyou County. The movement’s poorly designed logo, with XX in the middle, has been the subject of ridicule among graphic designers for decades.
The State of Jefferson seeks to grab the public’s attention to its message by tying the XX logo to the X-rated porn and strip club industry.
“We are considering adding a third X to our logo,” said Dave Kennon, a spokesman for the group. “That way, we can advertise as triple X and compete with adult gentlemen’s clubs in Redding, Medford, and Yreka. Of course, all funds will go to the state of Jefferson’s cause after payroll, and other overheads are met.”
“Besides, we might be getting sued by Dos Equis beer [see the previous story], so we may do that sooner than later,” he added.
The shop next to the state of Jefferson Strip Club christened the “Pornorama,” will carry sex toys and other merchandise with the movement’s XX logo prominently on each item.
“It’s a brilliant idea,” declared Diogenes Scadden, a political analyst and pundit. “Although the state of Jefferson movement has its signs up all over the place, this is a new direction. They attract attention with tits and maximize exposure to the XX brand. With the “Pornorama” right next to the club, they can further penetrate the State of Jefferson’s cause into the public square and raise awareness through swag and sex toys.”
“Oh Hell, yeah!” said Tripp Geary, an unemployed truck driver, reacting to the news that a strip club and porn shop were opening in his town. He had no further comment.
Others were not so enthusiastic. The Church of the Unleavened, an unrecognized branch of some tiny Pentecostal splinter group, gathered its three parishioners to protest at the club’s opening.
“This is not what our godly community wants,” said Reverend Steve Baker, leader of the sect. “Our church does not approve of this sin being brought into our community. Women should be well-covered and unleavened, just like our Bible says.”
“However, we fully support the state of Jefferson and their attempt to split from the ungodly and sinful state of California, which is on Jerry Brown’s high-speed train to Hell,” he added.
“Big bouncy hooters and cheap drinks I need right now!” Wayne Hill, waiting in line for the grand opening. “The State of California only pays me my unemployment every two weeks. I hope I have some leftovers for lap dances and whiskey chasers. If not, that would suck.”
“A classic marketing campaign through product placement and bodacious ta-tas,” said Diogenes Scadden. “No other political movement can compete with this!”
(DISCLAIMER: Despite the initials in his name, Xander X. Xanthangum is neither associated with nor endorses the state of Jefferson XX movement or the XX or XXX strip club/porn industries.)
