Search

Articles by

Cleveland Sam

Cleveland Sam, born Sam C. Sharpe, is a hero, a hero to anyone who knows him in Ohio. At the mere age of 7, he rescued a small girl from the clutches of a herd of llamas outside his boyhood home of Cleveland, OH. By the age of 12, he had already rescued over 14 children from near deaths ranging from freak ice cream truck accidents, to drownings in neighbors' Dough Boy Pools. But his heroism didn't stop at youth. No sir. As a teenager, he saved the entire cheerleading squad of his local high school from certain death with their "party van" caught fire during a local "rager." He writes for Gish Gallop because he feels he needs to rescue it. He's probably correct.
facebook
National News

Richard Simmons To Aid North Korean Leaders Weight Loss

North Korean leader Kim Jong Un's weight has been the subject of ridicule since taking power after his Father's death. Recently he became angered after John McCain called him, "the lil fat kid".
Cleveland Sam -
Read
National News

Legendary Basketball Player Arnold Palmer Dead At 87

Palmer was 87.
Cleveland Sam -
Read
National News

Infowars.com Debuts New Tin Foil Facemask

Stylish and sleek, the new tin foil mask will protect you from alien breath rays.
Cleveland Sam -
Read
National News

FEMA Statement: We’re Fucked

Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) released a statement saying that we're doomed and have no hope.
Cleveland Sam -
Read
Local News

Fan Claims Nickelback’s Music Prevents COVID-19

It turns out, Nickelback is good for at least one thing.
Cleveland Sam -
Read
National News

Stephen Curry Under Investigation For Point Shaving During NBA Finals

NBA Commissioner Adam Silver has ordered an investigation after rumors of point shaving surfaced after game 7. The investigation has already started with Curry being ordered to appear in front of investigators at the NBA headquarters in New York City on Friday.
Cleveland Sam -
Read
National News

Julian Assange On Hunger Strike Until his Gender Is Recognized

The founder of Wikileaks Julian Assange has begun a hunger strike and has vowed to not eat until his gender has been recognized. Assange has chosen the gender of male, and the sub gender of man.
Cleveland Sam -
Read
National News

Mayweather and McGregor To Wear Rompers During Fight

Conor McGregor and Floyd Mayweather will come together in an epic boxing match on August 26. The fight is expected to earn the fighters upwards of $180 million dollars, but it is not what the fight would mean if Mayweather loses that has captivated audiences.
Cleveland Sam -
Read

Want to stay up to date with the latest news?

We would love to hear from you! Please fill in your details and we will stay in touch. It's that simple!

It's for your head.

Latest Posts

Iranian Leadership’s Sony PlayStations Reportedly Exploding

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein - 0
Iranian officials’ PlayStations are reportedly exploding, leaving the ruling class grappling with a new “crisis” while citizens endure far worse hardships. Whether it's Israeli sabotage or just bad wiring, the explosions highlight the absurd disparity between the elite and everyday Iranians. Spoiler: most Iranians don’t even know what a PlayStation 5 is.

Biden-Harris Admin Accused of Using HAARP to Blow Away Florida Voters

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein - 0
Conspiracy theorists are alleging that the Biden-Harris administration is weaponizing HAARP to control Hurricane Helene and suppress Republican voters in Florida. Theories of mind control, 5G nanoparticles, and chemtrails swirl, but Caltech astrophysicist Dr. Tral Aldrich debunks the claims, tiredly reminding everyone that HAARP is a research facility, not a joystick for manipulating elections or the weather.

The Entire John Steinbeck Catalog Now a 5-Minute TikTok Video

Loretta Splitair - 0
Tom Joad stands in disbelief as his family’s struggle is transformed into a five-minute TikTok sensation. Their story, once defined by hardship and dignity, is now a viral meme, shared and forgotten in seconds. As the world scrolls past, Tom realizes that in this digital age, human suffering is nothing more than content for a blind and fleeting audience.

Haitian Cat Allegedly Eats Springfield Trump Supporter

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein - 0
In Springfield, OH, Mittens the cat is under investigation for allegedly eating a Trump supporter after a heated debate over the 2020 election results. Outrage is sweeping certain political circles, with claims of a Democrat-led conspiracy involving weaponized pets. Meanwhile, sane locals are tired of the media circus and wonder when people will start focusing on real issues—like potholes.

Alex Jones Claims Biden Conspired to Keep 20-Piece Chicken McNuggets Over $10

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein - 0
Alex Jones is back with a crispy new conspiracy: Biden’s colluding with Big Chicken to keep 20-piece McNuggets over $10, as part of a sinister plot to control the masses through overpriced fast food. He warns of the rise of nuggets as currency and a looming sauce shortage. You thought the economy was complicated? Think again.

Most Popular

Skydiver Caught by 737 Dragged For 200 Miles

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein - 21
A Manteca, CA man is lucky to be alive following an encounter with a Boeing 737.

Trump Tours Chemtrail Plane and Promises to Stop the Geoengineering Program

Michael Stephen - 1600
Former President Donald Trump inspected a chemtrail-equipped Boeing 767 at Andrews Air Force Base, vowing to dismantle the controversial program. Joined by Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene, Trump aims to redirect funds to infrastructure and his border wall. The plan faces significant hurdles, including Congressional approval and Senate resistance, but anti-chemtrail activists are cautiously optimistic.

Family Cited For Viking Funeral on Local Lake

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein - 0
A local Norwegian family from the Cascade Shores housing development is in hot water for attempting to cremate a deceased relative on Scotts Flat Lake earlier today. The Barstad family recently suffer the loss of the family's patriarch, Norman Barstad, who had lived with the family at their Spanish Lane home.

Local Militia Attempts to Reopen Denny’s

Roy Riffle - 0
A Placer County self-proclaimed 'patriot militia' attempted to re-open a Newcastle Denny's restaurant.

Bilderberg Group to Meet in Sierra City in 2025

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein - 0
The annual private meeting of North American and European elites known as the Bilderberg Group announced this week that they will be holding their annual conference at Herrington's Sierra Pines Resort in June of 2022.

Fast Access

© The Fazzler| All rights reserved | Always Do The Right Thing