Articles by
Cleveland Sam
Cleveland Sam, born Sam C. Sharpe, is a hero, a hero to anyone who knows him in Ohio. At the mere age of 7, he rescued a small girl from the clutches of a herd of llamas outside his boyhood home of Cleveland, OH. By the age of 12, he had already rescued over 14 children from near deaths ranging from freak ice cream truck accidents, to drownings in neighbors' Dough Boy Pools. But his heroism didn't stop at youth. No sir. As a teenager, he saved the entire cheerleading squad of his local high school from certain death with their "party van" caught fire during a local "rager." He writes for Gish Gallop because he feels he needs to rescue it. He's probably correct.
National News
Claim: Bernie Sanders Born in Havana, Cuba
The Sanders family lived in the Cuban city of Santa Clara and the young Sanders grew to admire Che Guevara and Fidel Castro for the caring way in which they treated the people of Cuba.
Art
Mormon Graffiti Saved Man in Idaho Truck Stop
The Mormon church has been around since the mid-1800's by Joseph Smith under questionable pretenses. It has since grown to 14 million members around the world. The Mormons use all manner of recruiting tools to save souls.
Chemtrails
Hostess Develops Cannabis Strain Product Line
The Hostess Snack Corp. is best known for Twinkies, Ho-Ho's and Ding Dongs, has been spending a significant amount of money to develop their own marijuana strain.
National News
Kool-Aid Man Arrested For Property Damage
Kool-Aid man was arrested yesterday after bursting through three walls of houses on the West Side neighborhood of Tremont City, OH, where he did an estimated $60,000 in damages.
National News
Bro on Bro Violence Plagues Hipster Community
Tim Schorer is a hipster who's had his man bun scalped in the escalating Bro violence.
National News
Richard Simmons Releases New Video, “Transitioning To The Oldies”
Today Simmons announced that he is releasing a new video for other "transitioning" people. It will be titled, "Transtioning To The Oldies."
Food
Denny’s To Charge For Premium Service
Denny's is adding a "tiered" service menu to generate more revenue and attract new customers: good service, decent service, or regular terrible service. The program is set to roll out in select cities next week.
Chemtrails
New Study: Chemtrails Are Great For Your Complexion
At Sierra Community College in Grass Valley, CA, science student Sandra Willis has made an ironic discovery about the utility of chemtrails: they are great for your complexion. Unfortunately, Sandra Willis' discovery might sway naysayers into the pro-chemtrail camp.
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