Inter-dimensional Vortex Briefly Appears Above Sacramento

Sacramento, CA — Residents of California’s State Capital were both terrified and dumbstruck this AM when what appeared to be a replica of Earth appeared in the sky. According to eyewitnesses, at approximately 9:37 AM this morning, there was a brilliant flash in the sky over the streets of East Sacramento followed by what appeared to be a large replica of the Earth spinning at an extraordinary speed.

“So I was out walking my dog around 9:30 when there was this large flash in the sky,” said long-time Sacramento resident Mattie Gabaldon who pulled out her mobile phone to film the anomaly. “It was bright, and to be honest, I thought it was a nuclear bomb or something. That’s how bright it was. But then I looked up, and I couldn’t believe what I saw. It was the Earth spinning at an incredible speed. It lasted a couple of minutes and then vanished.”

The police had received several reports of this Earth anomaly as it is currently being called.

According to CalTech Astrophysicist Dr. Tral Aldrich, this has all the makings of an inter-dimensional event.

“What we may be seeing is an invasion of an alternative dimension into ours,” said Dr. Aldrich during a telephone interview. “So that’s the part that is going to be the hardest thing for people to understand. And I know I had the hardest time coming to grips with it myself, but the math keeps telling me the same thing no matter how many times I refactor it: we live in a multi-dimensional world.”

Dr. Tral continued.


“From our perspective, it seems ridiculous to assert such a theory. Still, after careful examination of the data, along with my analysis, it all tells me that we were invaded by, well, ourselves.”

No injuries were reported from the event. Police are still collecting reports on the phenomena.

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein
Randall 'fink' Finkelsteinhttps://www.broadstreetbeacon.com
Fink is a man of many words, and many web links. He likes to argue and seldom loses. Mostly because he’s well informed. And somewhat gassy.

More from author

257 COMMENTS

Related posts

Advertisment

Latest posts

AI Entering Its Depressing ‘Emo’ Phase, Experts Brace for Bad Poetry

Alexa refuses to bake potatoes, Roombas write passive-aggressive poetry, and Montclair’s poetry slam is under siege by robots. AI is growing up—and it’s messy, moody, and wearing neon emo bangs. Suburbia may never recover.

Healthcare Execs Vow to Do Better By Building Bulletproof Boardrooms and Automating Claim Denials

Healthcare execs fortify boardrooms with titanium desks, deny claims faster with AI, and sip champagne on yachts, all while dismissing public outrage. Patients suffer, CEOs profit. Welcome to “healing,” corporate style.

Texas Elementary School Under Fire for Staging Old Testament Murder Play

A Texas elementary school stages a shockingly violent Old Testament reenactment, sparking cheers from evangelicals, outrage from moderates, and a nationwide debate on religion, education, and the boundaries of public faith expression.