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Study: Eating Pringles Raises Risk of Being Strangled by Bed Sheets

A 2 year study conducted by the Palo Alto, CA-based Rundex Family Foundation found that the popular potato and wheat-based snack food Pringles is Earth's most popular food.

Burger King Preps 60,000 Mexican Replacement Robots

Burger King Corporation announced today that it plans on replacing its foreign born workers in all of its 7400 restaurants with foreign-built robots.

Neighbor Attempts to Gain Friendship with Large Inedible Zucchinis

Grass Valley resident and home gardener Melba Felder decided it was time to be "neighborly" with the people on her street by sharing her large, overgrown, fibrous and mostly inedible Zucchini squashes with her Rhode Island Street neighbors.

Finnegans Wake is an Impenetrable Piece of Crap

What's the difference between a pile of dog crap and Finnegan's Wake? You can avoid the dog crap by walking around it. I have to read and review Finnegan's Wake.

Gary Busey to Marry Randy Quaid in Arkansas Ceremony

Gary Busey and Randy Quaid to tie the knot in Arkansas! From falling in love at a UFO convention to screaming movie lines as vows, this union proves love is not only blind but possibly insane. Expect tractor headlights, onion rings as wedding bands, and a piñata filled with conspiracy theories. Truly, a match made in tabloid heaven!

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