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South Carolina’s “Giraffe King” Creates World’s First Compact Giraffes

In Fair Play, South Carolina, eccentric Bobby Lee Jenkins astounds the world with his peculiar creation: short-necked giraffes. These whimsical creatures, Dolly, Molly, and Wally, blur the line between genius and madness, while townsfolk marvel at the spectacle. A curious tale of ambition and animal husbandry unfolds in this quaint Southern township.

Police Fraternity Planning a Surprise Party for Quentin Tarantino

Following comments made by American film director and actor Quentin Tarantino at a New York City protest, the Fraternal Order of Police Officers announced last week that it was planning a "surprise party" for him as a way of thanking him for his recent "support" of police officers.

FDR’s Image to Grace New EBT Cards

Electronic benefit transfer or EBT cards as they are more popularly known, will be embossed with an image of the 32nd President of the United States Franklin D. Roosevelt.

CNN’s Dana Bash Still in Sibling Fight Over Childhood Big Wheel

Esteemed CNN Chief Political Correspondent Dana Bash admitted this morning that she is still struggling with her brother over a Big Wheel he received when they were children.

Cheerleader Accidentally Relieves Herself Midair

A Knoxville area cheerleader has become news in an unfortunate way this past Friday night when she accidentally had a bowel movement midair during the varsity football game halftime show.

Report: Applebee’s Restaurants Nation’s Number One Dining Destination for Nazis

A joint 8 month study conducted by the Rundex Family Foundation and the American Enterprise Institute has found that Nazis prefer the dining selection at Applebee's Restaurants by a factor of 2 to 1 over the next closest chain.

Mormons and Scientologists to Join Forces

After realizing that both American-born religions share numerous similarities in their mythologies and "spiritual technologies," leaders in both church organizations have decided to merge to increase their "synergistic reach into new demographics."

Walmart to Discontinue Lego AR-15 Play Kit

After receiving pressure from anti-gun groups and documentary film maker Michael Moore, the world's largest retailer Walmart announced today that it was removing all Legoâ„¢ AR-15 rifle kits from its shelves.

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