Sadness swept across the 'woo-o-sphere' late today as news spread that the last remaining flying Unicorn was accidentally killed by a Chemtrail reduction program. The Redding, CA-based Chemtrail Action Network or CAN has been developing a patented anti-Chemtrail "shield system" for over 5 years largely with donations gathered from its website.
North San Juan resident, part-time chemtrail researcher and amateur ionizing radiation hobbyist Skyy Wolford announced to a somewhat disinterested crowd out in front of the Sierra Super Stop that St. George, Utah is an elaborate hoax and does not exist. Mr. Wolford, who was recently in the news following his landmark Wi-Fi disability settlement, has been studying what he calls "the Macon anomaly" for the past 3 years.
The Redding, California-based Chemtrail Action Network or CAN has announced what it is calling a series of "awareness products" which the controversial activists group claims would make excellent Christmas gifts.
In a groundbreaking move, Marin County introduces its FlatuFuel Bus Services, harnessing the mighty power of kale farts to save the environment. Affluent residents, despite never boarding a bus, eagerly contribute their kale-induced flatulence to fuel the buses. This eco-friendly initiative sparks a wave of green enthusiasm, proving that one person's toot can truly make a difference in the fight against climate change.
