Man Worried About Well Level Accidentally Runs It Dry

Jim Shoemaker of Grass Valley claims men do not know how to dry properly.
Jim Shoemaker of Grass Valley pumped his well dry testing to see if it was dry.

Grass Valley, CA — A Hidden Valley Road man accidentally ran is well dry after repeatedly testing the volume throughout the day on Sunday.

“I’ve been all freaked out about the drought,” said Joe Shoemaker from his Grass Valley home. “So I’ve been out testing my well a few times a day to get an understanding of the water pressure and whatnot. Well, it seems that I tested it too much.”

The current severe drought has raised the collective anxiety of Californians. When afraid or angry, critical thinking capacity tends to plummet and people tend to do and say all kinds of irrational things.

Some have taken to the social media to express their fears.

“I am very worried about my well as is everyone up here,” said North San Juan resident Merrilee Longshoes on a local Facebook group. “We’ve done everything we can think of to conserve water. Let’s just say there are people up here who are using more than their fair-share of the groundwater.”

Immediately after posting her concerns, Ms. Longshoes was ridiculed in the comment stream for not vaccinating her kids and for owning a pair of pit bulls. Neither of these had anything to do with the drought or the current water concerns in her area.

Others where more optimistic, like long time “Ridge” resident Shep “the Ship” Walkins.

“A lot of people up here are scared,” said a stoic Mr. Walkins, “but there’s always something to be scared about. I’ve seen plenty of crisis up here in my many years, and this one’s no different. Everyone just needs to calm the hell down and we’ll get through this.”

As for Mr. Shoemaker, he says he’s learned his lesson.

“I talked to the guys over at Peter’s Well, and they told me to relax and stop testing my well all day,” continued a calmer Mr. Shoemaker. “I’m gonna get a holding tank where I can see my water levels instead of running the valves at the pump house.”

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein
Randall 'fink' Finkelsteinhttps://www.broadstreetbeacon.com
Fink is a man of many words, and many web links. He likes to argue and seldom loses. Mostly because he’s well informed. And somewhat gassy.

More from author

Related posts

Advertisment

Latest posts

McDonald’s Bids Farewell to Epstein Island’s Last Golden Arches Amid Controversial Legacy

The McDonald’s on Epstein Island has shuttered its windows for good, marking the end of what the company now refers to as a "misguided adventure in international franchising." The closure comes amidst a whirlwind of controversy and a belated corporate acknowledgment that some locations, no matter how potentially profitable, are better left un-McTouched.

Bombshell Uncovered: Hunter S. Thompson’s Lost ‘Dr. Strangelove’ Audition

A recently unearthed photograph has revealed the unimaginable: Hunter S. Thompson, king of gonzo journalism, once commandeered the captain’s seat of a B-52, not in the throes of a drug-fueled fantasy, but as a contender for the iconic role in Kubrick’s 'Dr. Strangelove.' The discovery challenges everything we thought we knew about the man who lived on the edge of American sanity.