Satire

A Georgia-based white supremacist group has politely declined an invitation to hold a protest in South Central Los Angeles, CNN is reporting today.

Ah, the sweet irony of fretting over premiums while the real cost of conflict, funded by their own tax dollars, unfolds unseen.

In a groundbreaking move, Marin County introduces its FlatuFuel Bus Services, harnessing the mighty power of kale farts to save the environment. Affluent residents, despite never boarding a bus, eagerly contribute their kale-induced flatulence to fuel the buses. This eco-friendly initiative sparks a wave of green enthusiasm, proving that one person's toot can truly make a difference in the fight against climate change.

Hunter Biden announces he's not running for President in 2024, ending a non-existent campaign that captivated political circles.

The U.N. Security Council reconvenes to discuss the potential threat of U.S. weapons of mass destruction falling into dangerous hands ahead of the November elections. With a controversial former leader making a comeback, diplomats express concern over the world's safety. Russia, however, remains unconcerned, confident the candidate will heed their advice, not the U.N.'s.