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Incelville, Il — A Illinois men’s rights activist sounded the alarm this week claiming a battle is heating up between the factions of radical Islam and Feminism. Men Without Vaginas or MWV was founded in 2016 after a small group of men attended a Donald Trump rally in nearby Dixon, Illinois.

“We didn’t start warning people about the dangers of radical Islam and Feminism,” said MWV founder Sebastian ‘The Pigeon” Boyce speaking with the Associated Press earlier this week, “but we sure as hell grew into that. Look, it’s clear that other than President Trump, the country is being run by Mooslems [sic] and Feminazis. And now that they’re fighting each other, there’s a reason for the hope that they’ll cancel each other out. But they could take a lot of patriots with them in the process.”

MWV is an active Incel group in Southern Illinois. Incels, which is a portmanteau for “involuntarily celibate,” are men who generally have horrible personalities and treat women as sexual objects. They believe their lack of a sex life comes from being “ugly” when it is just his blatant sexism and terrible attitude. Incels have little to no self-awareness.

Mr. Boyce is hopeful that such a battle between Muslims and feminists will help “thin out the dating pool” in favor of incels like him.

“I mean, I love this country, and I hate to see it taken over by these godless forces,” continued Boyce, “But we have selfish reasons too. With fewer lesbian feminists and Mooslems stealing our women, we have a real chance of having a girl to have sex with, you know?”

Boyce hopes that the battle between these forces will happen soon, so he can stop masturbating and have “some real sex with a real woman.”

According to both the Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) and the National Organization of Women (NOW), neither group nor the people they represent plan on taking over the country nor engaging in battle with the other.

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