Satire
Louisiana Teacher Under Fire for Posting 10 Commandments in Pig Latin
History teacher Bernie Carver stirred controversy by displaying the Ten Commandments in Pig Latin, provoking ire from conservative parents. Earl "Big Earl" LeJeune fumed, "This is part of a larger conspiracy. Next, they'll be speaking French! And you know what they say about French – it's the language of the devil!"
Music
The Fazzler Review: Fear Inoculum by Tool — Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Hype
Can Tool’s Fear Inoculum live up to its labyrinthine lyrics and technical bravado, or is the fanbase’s fervor and critics' praise a testament to rock’s most elaborate inside joke?
Chemtrails
Ed Force One Cited for Unauthorized Chemtrail Emissions
British heavy metal legends Iron Maiden are being investigated for illegal chemtrail spraying with the use of their customized touring aircraft, the ex-Air France 747-400 jumbo jet known as Ed Force One.
National News
Trump Announces Plan for Westboro Baptist Church Choir to Perform at His Inauguration
"It's no secret that the Church has never supported any president up until Trump," said Shirley Phelps-Roper, daughter of former outspoken and controversial leader Fred Phelps, "but with Trump, we finally have an executive who will take the fight right to the gays. We don't even have to protest anymore."
Alternative
Inside Elon Musk’s Bid to Buy the Roman Colosseum and Move it to Texas
Elon Musk's audacious plan to relocate the Roman Colosseum to Austin, Texas, transforming it into a modern sports arena with fast food chains, creating a unique fusion of ancient history and American consumer culture.
National News
Yellowstone Tourists Embrace New “Lion Encounter”
Yellowstone's new "Lion Encounter" feature has tourists stepping out of their cars to snap selfies with lions, oblivious to the danger. Despite warnings from experts, the thrill of a perfect Instagram shot outweighs safety concerns. "What's a little danger when you're making memories?" says BrightStar's spokeswoman, Bethany Millbright.
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Chemtrails
You know they are controlling the skies. Here's the proof.
Ed Force One Cited for Unauthorized Chemtrail Emissions
British heavy metal legends Iron Maiden are being investigated for illegal chemtrail spraying with the use of their customized touring aircraft, the ex-Air France 747-400 jumbo jet known as Ed Force One.
Sotheby’s To Auction Off Original Prototype of MyPillow
Sotheby’s stuns with a once-in-a-lifetime auction, offering the original MyPillow prototype—purportedly stuffed with the essence of the American dream—set to redefine luxury sleep and history, one overpriced, patriotically infused bid at a time.
QAnon Posts 4th Quarter Profit Despite Failed Predictions
In a surprise announcement, QAnon's stock skyrocketed over the past quarter.
Alternative
Sat upright, raising a heavy fur muff that covered the whole of her lower arm towards the viewer. He then turned to look out the window.
Inside Elon Musk’s Bid to Buy the Roman Colosseum and Move it to Texas
Elon Musk's audacious plan to relocate the Roman Colosseum to Austin, Texas, transforming it into a modern sports arena with fast food chains, creating a unique fusion of ancient history and American consumer culture.
Sotheby’s To Auction Off Original Prototype of MyPillow
Sotheby’s stuns with a once-in-a-lifetime auction, offering the original MyPillow prototype—purportedly stuffed with the essence of the American dream—set to redefine luxury sleep and history, one overpriced, patriotically infused bid at a time.
Cancer Patient Prays to God For Help, God Says No
During a late-night prayer session, Louise and Sam prayed incessantly to God. And for hours, nothing. Not a peep from the almighty. Not even a small sign from above.
High Stakes News
And he looked over at the alarm clock, ticking on the chest of drawers. It was half past six and the hands were quietly moving forwards.
Terrible Stock Photo Toons Volume 11
Welcome to Volume 11 of Terrible Stock Toons. Please wash your hands before returning to the table.
Kansas Farmer Denies Meeting Traveling Nevada City Activist
Just days after announcing her documentary project, Nevada City activist Saihra Ramun is having to explain how several Kansas farmers mentioned in her memoirs claim to have never met the Sierra Foothills firebrand.
Sesame Street Reluctantly Gives Directions to Itself
The famous children's television street finally had to breakdown and give directions to itself.
Unexplained
It's here. It's strange. You want this.
Chemtrail Film Festival Coming To Nevada City, CA
The Chemtrail Action Network (CAN) announced the first-ever traveling Chemtrail Film Festival coming to Nevada City, CA this August. The film festival will be making its first stop in the secluded Sierra Nevada Foothills town for a 4 day run starting on the 14th of August and running until the 18th.
Self-Driving Car Totaled After Bigfoot Encounter Near North San Juan
When the Highway Patrol arrived on the scene, they found a mess of twisted metal and a little bit of hair.
Investigators Stumble Upon Secret Graniteville Bunker
This is where the adventure begins. The following is a edited recount of Moonash's and Mr. Wolford's unusual discovery. Residents of the usually private and esoteric Sierra Nevada foothills community didn't know about this.
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Other News
More Fazzle for your brain.
Chemtrails
Trump Tours Chemtrail Plane and Promises to Terminate Program
Donald Trump accompanied by select members of his cabinet toured a chemtrail-outfitted dispersal airplane at Andrews Air Force Base yesterday afternoon, according to a news report today.
Chemtrails
Chemtrail Believer Bullied by “Math Thugs”
Mary McAlister seemed surprised that others took issue with her incendiary share of a billboard picture that warned people of the dangers of geoengineering.
Paranormal
State of Jefferson to Host Nation’s First Bigfoot Sanctuary
The California contingent of the State of Jefferson (SoJ) secessionist movement announced today that it plans on establishing the nation's first Sasquatch sanctuary located in Siskiyou County.
Satire
Local Militia Attempts to Reopen Denny’s
A Placer County self-proclaimed 'patriot militia' attempted to re-open a Newcastle Denny's restaurant.
Weird
Bilderberg Group to Meet in Sierra City in 2022
The annual private meeting of North American and European elites known as the Bilderberg Group announced this week that they will be holding their annual conference at Herrington's Sierra Pines Resort in June of 2022.
Satire
Man Falls Off Foresthill Bridge After Accidentally Shooting Himself While on Heroin
A Mokelumne Hill man is lucky to be alive after falling 730 feet in a failed suicide attempt.
Satire
Nevada City to Become Nation’s First 5G-free Zone
Nevada City, California will be the nation's first town to ban all 5G-related technologies.