Area Man Recounts His Long Relationship with Secret Psychedelic Casino Chimp

Nevada City, CA — Area fixture and expert check-writer Toby ‘Doob’ Carnevale admitted to the check-out clerk at Nevada City’s SPD Market that he has “a long relationship with a psychedelic Secret casino chimp.” Carnevale made the interesting comments after attempting to purchase a single-stick of Juicy Fruit Gum using a check.

“Well you see, I was just a kid back then,” said a disheveled Mr. Carnevale looking around for a pen to sign his check. “I was left in a bedroom with three 1/2 tabs of Pink Floyd. I took one, and nothing. So I took three more and boy, that was something.”

Mr. Carnevale, who was 19 at the time of his first acid experience, described to the attentive clerk how developed his life-long relationship with his not-so-imaginary primate.


“He left me on my own in his bedroom for over an hour deliberately, to see if I freaked out and I had a lengthy conversation with a picture of a baby chimpanzee, who I believed to be a blackjack dealer at a casino, that was only accessible through a secret door I had accidentally unlocked by dropping my cigarette on the floor in just the right spot. Shit got a bit weird after that though.”

SPD Grocery store checkout clerk Megan Albright handled Mr. Carnevale’s $.17 transaction, and listened courteously to his odd rambling.

“Doob comes in here all the time. We sometimes catch him in the front drinking milk out of the containers. But this chimp-thing was new. He can sure tell a story.”

According to Mr. Carnevale, this intense relationship continued for several years and has changed over time.

“He took on many different forms over the years,” continued Doob, “but he’s one of the few things that’s stuck by my side. Of course it makes people a little nervous when I start talking to him on Broad Street, but most of the locals get it now.”

More from author

Related posts

Advertisment

Latest posts

Sotheby’s To Auction Off Original Prototype of MyPillow

Sotheby’s stuns with a once-in-a-lifetime auction, offering the original MyPillow prototype—purportedly stuffed with the essence of the American dream—set to redefine luxury sleep and history, one overpriced, patriotically infused bid at a time.

McDonald’s Bids Farewell to Epstein Island’s Last Golden Arches Amid Controversial Legacy

The McDonald’s on Epstein Island has shuttered its windows for good, marking the end of what the company now refers to as a "misguided adventure in international franchising." The closure comes amidst a whirlwind of controversy and a belated corporate acknowledgment that some locations, no matter how potentially profitable, are better left un-McTouched.

Bombshell Uncovered: Hunter S. Thompson’s Lost ‘Dr. Strangelove’ Audition

A recently unearthed photograph has revealed the unimaginable: Hunter S. Thompson, king of gonzo journalism, once commandeered the captain’s seat of a B-52, not in the throes of a drug-fueled fantasy, but as a contender for the iconic role in Kubrick’s 'Dr. Strangelove.' The discovery challenges everything we thought we knew about the man who lived on the edge of American sanity.