Nevada City 5G Injury Lawyer Files Bankruptcy

Nevada City, CA — Nevada City, California, has pioneered the anti-5G wireless movement, having recently banned the controversial radio waves from the city limits. Around this cottage industry, area attorney Katherine Lucy-Elizabeth Tatum-Stonehousefelder set up shop to field complaints about 5G injuries even though 5G has yet to be implemented.

Late last week, Ms. Tatum-Stonehousefelder filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy citing “insufficient business.”

“We will continue to keep the fight going,” said Ms. Tatum-Stonehousefelder in a Facebook post, “but we need to get our financing straightened out. This battle is coming at us, and we’re prepared to fight. Just not at the moment.”

Trouble started late last year for the law firm Tatum-Stonehousefelder and Aioli, LLC when lower courts dismissed several of their class-action lawsuits. Even upon appeal, the courts refused to hear their cases dues to, in the words of a Superior Court judge, “having the credibility of UFOs and other ridiculous nonsense.”

However, the firm persevered, attempting to shakedown several telecommunications companies directly for “future legal fees and injuries.” An action that briefly landed Ms. Tatum-Stonehousefelder in jail for attempted extortion. After paying several fines, Tatum-Stonehousefelder and Aioli filed for bankruptcy.

Roy Riffle
Roy Riffle
Our youngest columnist, Roy Riffle gained fortune, though not necessarily fame, when at 9 years old he coined the phrase "Obey Your Thirst". Some of his smugness stems from "having read the bible and understanding the metaphors." Roy is currently the only Millennial on Gish Gallop payroll. And hopefully the last.

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