Yankee Fans Rejoice as Fenway Park Chosen for Terrorism Simulation

Yankee Fan rejoice at Fenway park drill. Source Bernard Gagnon-ish
Yankee Fan rejoices at Fenway Park drill. Source Bernard Gagnon-ish

Boston, MA — The Boston Police Department  working with the Department of Homeland Security, the US Army Armament Research, Development, and Engineering Center and Fenway Park has been asking for local volunteers to participate in what it’s calling an “active terrorist shooter situation” in the home of the Red Sox baseball team. The exercise, which will run from 7 a.m. until 1 p.m. Sunday, thrilled New York Yankee fans as it raised the possibility of derailing their rivals chances at winning the American League Pennant.

The drill which will run this weekend will be led by the Boston Police and will feature multiple explosions and gun rounds and other realistic sounds that Yankee supporters say will frighten the “simple-minded Red Sox fans”

“Look, this thing will give Sox fans something else to focus on other than the Yankees losing,” said long time Yankees fan William Abate of Queens. “I mean, do they do anything else other than that? You know, other than losing?”

Officials were quick to stress there are no threats or any security concerns, and the event is just a drill. The police department is hoping to draft as many as 100 local fans for the event. Yankee fans are not invited.

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein
Randall 'fink' Finkelsteinhttps://www.broadstreetbeacon.com
Fink is a man of many words, and many web links. He likes to argue and seldom loses. Mostly because he’s well informed. And somewhat gassy.

More from author

Related posts


Latest posts

Sotheby’s To Auction Off Original Prototype of MyPillow

Sotheby’s stuns with a once-in-a-lifetime auction, offering the original MyPillow prototype—purportedly stuffed with the essence of the American dream—set to redefine luxury sleep and history, one overpriced, patriotically infused bid at a time.

McDonald’s Bids Farewell to Epstein Island’s Last Golden Arches Amid Controversial Legacy

The McDonald’s on Epstein Island has shuttered its windows for good, marking the end of what the company now refers to as a "misguided adventure in international franchising." The closure comes amidst a whirlwind of controversy and a belated corporate acknowledgment that some locations, no matter how potentially profitable, are better left un-McTouched.

Bombshell Uncovered: Hunter S. Thompson’s Lost ‘Dr. Strangelove’ Audition

A recently unearthed photograph has revealed the unimaginable: Hunter S. Thompson, king of gonzo journalism, once commandeered the captain’s seat of a B-52, not in the throes of a drug-fueled fantasy, but as a contender for the iconic role in Kubrick’s 'Dr. Strangelove.' The discovery challenges everything we thought we knew about the man who lived on the edge of American sanity.