Jesus Fights Godzilla in the Heavens

An epic battle was spotted over Nevada County's skies this week when Jesus fought Godzilla for sky dominance.
An epic battle was spotted over Nevada County’s skies this week when Jesus fought Godzilla for sky dominance.

Nevada County, CA — Not long after Jesus made an appearance over the skies of Nevada County, Godzilla, who is a giant monster awakened by the nuclear disaster in Japan’s Fukushima Prefecture, challenged the leader of the world’s largest religion to a “fight for the heavens” according to witnesses at the Higgins Road Chevron station.

“I was just there getting some propane for my ‘genny, when I looked up and saw both of them fighting,” said Information Technology worker John Boyd of Penn Valley who commutes to Sacramento each day. “I’ve never seen anything like it. Basically the monster had zero chance of winning against Jesus, but I have to say, he put up a good fight.”

The picture above was taken by Lake of the Pines resident Margaret Porter as she was returning from a Costco trip in Roseville, CA. It was shot at dusk using her mobile phone.

“Thank goodness my son showed me how to use this iPhone camera,” said Ms. Porter in a The Fazzler telephone interview. “I was driving home with a bunch of toilet paper and paper towels stacked high in the back seat of my Oldsmobile. I couldn’t see out the back window, so I was checking my side windows when I saw him in the clouds. So I pulled over and took a picture.”

Mr. Porter then shared the photo on the popular Facebook Group Nevada County Peeps and the post garnered over 945 likes and 1045 shares within eight hours.

Jesus Tree
Alta Sierra’s “Jesus Tree” actually bet on Godzilla.

Not to be out done,  the “Jesus Tree,” who watched the entire battle from his Alta Sierra yard was nonplussed.

“Oh that cloud Jesus is always showing off,” said Jesus Tree in an interview at his Francis Drive home in Alta Sierra. “I’ve seen it all, because I’m a tree and I’ve got much more staying power than these clouds. They come and they go. They blow with the wind. But I’ve got deep roots with a foundation build on stone. All that said, I have to say Cloud Jesus really came through, although I have to be honest with you: I was rooting for Godzilla. I know. Not good. But I like to put my odds on the underdog.”

According to Mr. Boyd, the battle lasted about 4 minutes or almost exactly the time it took to fill his tank.

“Well, it was over before it started it seemed,” continued Mr. Boyd. “As soon as I looked down, to take the nozzle off my tank, they were both gone. I’m just glad I got to see it.”

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein
Randall 'fink' Finkelstein
Fink is a man of many words, and many web links. He likes to argue and seldom loses. Mostly because he’s well informed. And somewhat gassy.

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