Florida Researchers Discover World’s First Natural Fluoride Spring

Ponce de León Fountain of Youth has been found outside of Orlando, FL. And it's a fluoride spring and a highway retention pond.
Ponce de León’s Fountain of Youth has been found outside of Orlando, FL. And it’s a fluoride spring and a highway retention pond.

Orlando, FL — A team of University of Florida researchers led by esteemed Bio-Archaeologist Dr. Mark Todd Davis have discovered what they believe is the world’s first and only natural fluoride spring out side the Orlando city limits. The true nature of the spring, which has been rumored to exist for centuries as a part of Native American Seminole folklore, remained undiscovered up until this week.

“People said we were crazy and the university initially told us no,” said Professor Davis outside is Gainesville office. “But I have my hands on Ponce de León’s diary and notes from what he called La Florida in 1524. When I showed this to the Provost, he couldn’t help but fund the expedition. And what we found was nothing short of amazing.”

According to a 534 page report filed by Dr. Davis’ team and released to the Orlando Sentinel this week, it appears that there was a “fountain of youth” in Florida which New World explorer de León sought. Of sorts. However the fountain of Seminole legend was actually a naturally occurring, bubbling fluoride pond with contains over 93% of the inorganic, monatomic anion, 5% water and currently just under 2% automobile lubricants.

“Well it explains a lot,” continued Professor Davis. “Word of something like this pond, which by the way the Seminoles called Oklane Ooki or yellow water, would have traveled wide and far. Especially due to the healing powers of fluoride. It also explains why Seminoles has perfect teeth and it was said that their children could lift a full-grown hog over their heads. Well, by the time stories like this got to de León in Puerto Rico, it probably sounded more like what we know of as the fountain of youth.”

What’s most remarkable about this find is how relatively uncommon its location is. The pond is located just southwest of Orlando on Interstate 4 just before the Florida turnpike. It’s been used for years as a retention reservoir for freeway runoff. However despite decades of pollution, the water is not only safe to drink, but still maintains is remarkable healing qualities.

“I’ve been drinking out of that pond for years,” said Orlando resident Wendy Michel who lives in nearby Everglades Ease Mobile Home Park and was enjoying a Pall Mall cigarette. “And just look at these teeth. I’m 69 years old and not one cavity. These are all my teeth. It’s been harder to get at the water since they fenced it off, I dunno, some 15 years ago, but we manage. I think that water has added years onto my life.” The pond is currently on FDOT (Florida Department of Transportation) land and is surrounded by high fencing with razor wire.

As for Dr. Davis, he thinks this is just the beginning.

“Well, we’re investigating other ponds in the area,” continued a beaming Professor Davis. “It doesn’t take a PhD to deduce that such high concentrations of fluoride should be elsewhere in the area. We expect to find many more over the next few months.”

Randall 'fink' Finkelstein
Randall 'fink' Finkelsteinhttps://www.broadstreetbeacon.com
Fink is a man of many words, and many web links. He likes to argue and seldom loses. Mostly because he’s well informed. And somewhat gassy.

More from author

Related posts


Latest posts

Sotheby’s To Auction Off Original Prototype of MyPillow

Sotheby’s stuns with a once-in-a-lifetime auction, offering the original MyPillow prototype—purportedly stuffed with the essence of the American dream—set to redefine luxury sleep and history, one overpriced, patriotically infused bid at a time.

McDonald’s Bids Farewell to Epstein Island’s Last Golden Arches Amid Controversial Legacy

The McDonald’s on Epstein Island has shuttered its windows for good, marking the end of what the company now refers to as a "misguided adventure in international franchising." The closure comes amidst a whirlwind of controversy and a belated corporate acknowledgment that some locations, no matter how potentially profitable, are better left un-McTouched.

Bombshell Uncovered: Hunter S. Thompson’s Lost ‘Dr. Strangelove’ Audition

A recently unearthed photograph has revealed the unimaginable: Hunter S. Thompson, king of gonzo journalism, once commandeered the captain’s seat of a B-52, not in the throes of a drug-fueled fantasy, but as a contender for the iconic role in Kubrick’s 'Dr. Strangelove.' The discovery challenges everything we thought we knew about the man who lived on the edge of American sanity.